“My child, from your youth, choose discipline, and when you have gray hair you will find wisdom” (Sirach 6:18).
Discipline precedes wisdom.
It must.
Do you want to have children who grow to be wise as adults? Then you must follow the template laid out in Sirach and adopt a biblical approach to parenting.
“If you wish, my son, you can be wise, if you apply yourself, you can be shrewd. If you are willing to listen, you can learn, if you pay attention, you can be instructed” (Sirach 6:32-33).
Help them to develop the character necessary to apply themselves.
Give them the confidence to use the gifts the Lord has given them.
Teach them to listen. Really listen. To put down their phones, look you in the eyes, and listen.
There were times when I would tell my children something and then ask “What did I just say, repeat it back to me”. I needed to know confidently that they were listening. Only then I could hold them accountable for that conversation. However, we must teach them to listen while they are young.
Children must pay attention or they will not be receptive to instruction – irrespective of how hard they try or how motivated they are.
Moreover, prolonged attention is a skill that must be developed. Multitasking, having screens on in the background, and constant noise in a home, are all conditions that prevent us from developing sustained attention. When we are distracted and bounce from task to task or idea to idea, stimulus to stimulus, we actually stunt our own growth. And we hamper our ability to learn.
Sirach is an ancient book, yet the wisdom therein is timeless. Strive for a well-ordered home, a well-ordered mind, and well-ordered children, who can choose discipline. And teach them to listen.
For practical tips on discipline, be sure to check out this podcast episode.