As we prepared to leave, a friend asked me if this was a family vacation or a family pilgrimage, and I responded that it depended on who was being asked. I have always made a distinction between vacations and family trips, but family pilgrimage? Was that even possible?
Before leaving, I asked the Lord to bless our time together and allow me to meet Him often wherever we were. The prayer was answered beautifully as my children embraced attending daily mass at the Duomo in Florence and the Vatican. We had Sunday mass at St Mark’s in Venice and Saint Mary Maggiore in Rome, and beautiful prayer time in Assisi. As we wandered the streets they would point out carved images of our Blessed Mother or the Sacred Heart of Jesus on buildings, and we discovered smaller churches where favorite saints were honored. We found the tombs of Saints Lucy, Catherine, Claire, Francis, Ignatius, and so many others. Wandered Santa Croce, enjoyed an impromptu concert in the Pazzi Chapel, and had the trifecta of Mass, Adoration, and Confession at St Peter’s. The kids discovered the Prayer Path and learned the most important phrase: sono qui per la messa, or just “la messa”. Our time together was strengthened by the Eucharist even if we didn’t understand the words spoken at consecration.
We discovered how to travel while entrenching ourselves in the Lord and our faith, rather than leaving it at home when we went away.
Can any trip be like this? Or is it just reserved for a country of saints? I don’t know the answer to that question. But I can share a few tips that helped us as a family dipping our toes into pilgrim life:
- Except that it will be hard and lower your expectations. Pilgrimages are supposed to be hard, vacations are supposed to be easy.
- Invite and introduce, but don’t force. I often presented options, told the children what I planned to do, and allowed them to choose. We usually were together, but on a few occasions, we were not. Sometimes it all worked out, but other times we had to move to Plan B. When we missed a daily mass, we opted to go to the church a little late and pray the rosary (or just wander).
- Leave room for moods, energy levels, and the physical needs of the kids. Most families couldn’t keep up with our schedule, and even our family couldn’t do it every day. We scratched one site and had a more relaxing evening instead. When someone got sick, a few of us stayed back to cook/tidy up while Bob took the energetic ones. Be flexible.
- Pack light. We have a rule – you pack it you carry it. The kids all had one big backpack and one smaller bag. That is it. And even then some of us overpacked. You don’t need everything you think you need. Too much stuff is burdensome. Reduce your load physically and emotionally and leave the stuff behind.
- Bring your own medicine. We passed around a little cold and were happy to have brought pseudoephedrine. One of the kids got a tummy bug and it was good that we had electrolyte packets and Pepto. We ran out of Dramamine and Tylenol but the Farmacia was easy since I knew what to ask for and I was healthy enough to do it. It is hard to be spiritually awakened when you are a mess physically.
- Enter into holy spaces as a Christian, not a Tourist. Many of these places were built for prayer and worship. They are not just places that house masterpieces of art, they are tabernacles of the Lord. Go to pray, not to gawk. Appreciate the history and beauty, but recognize the reason it exists. One of my highlights was attending mass, adoration, and confession at St. Peter’s on a Saturday morning. It was quiet and peaceful, and there were no lines. It was a stark contrast to my first visit to Rome as a tourist (before I converted).
Each trip we take gives me a chance to learn more about how to travel as a family. I am filled with appreciation as we return from this last trip. It was a beautiful journey with my favorite people in the world. We have grown together and individually in the best ways possible. My prayer for each reader is that you too will soon have the opportunity for a little family vacation or a family pilgrimage and that my tips help everything run smoothly.
For more parenting tips check out this post on traveling as a family or this podcast episode from Parenting Smarts. And you can always find a few photos of the trips on Instagram!
Thanks for stopping by!